Les Petites Morts
by goat dono
Summary: Shinigami/OC's. In death or orgasm, one transcends one's self. Nine short AU fictions about Shinigami who died in the human world, as told by those who knew them.
1. Rose

**Rating:** T (yaoi, drug use)

**Disclaimer:** Bleach is the property of Tite Kubo. I do not use its characters, settings and/or events for any profitable purpose.

* * *

><p><strong>Les Petites Morts<strong>

**I. Rose  
><strong>

* * *

><p>I guess it's a story that has played out a million times: small-town boy goes to big city and comes to some tragic end.<p>

He didn't stand a chance, really, with the upbringing he'd had. He grew up in Ogden, Utah, in one of those creepy Mormon enclaves that you read about once in a while. I don't think his family was strictly religious, it was more like they had all of the oppression with none of the morality. His father was a doctor who catted around with every woman in town and fed his mom drugs so she wouldn't get worked up about it. Downers and painkillers, mostly. That's how Rose started out - raiding his mother's stash.

But when they caught him fooling around with some boy he went to school with, they were quick to throw him out of the house with nothing but a habit to support. Because God hates fags and all. The hypocritical motherfuckers.

Rose was just a doe-eyed, innocent kid, way too handsome for his own good, so by the time he'd hitchhiked out here he was strung out on smack and was old hat at selling his body.

I met him at a party at some girl's band's house. It was nothing but a bunch of nodded-out kids and Rose, out on the fire escape playing the guitar. _Classical_ guitar. I don't know where he'd learned it - maybe he played in church or something. His skin was pale and fragile from all the drugs and his hair was dull and tangled, but still he looked like one of those paintings of blonde angels in church frescoes. Absolutely beautiful.

So, we hooked up. I had some money, and he needed a place, so it worked out all right. The sex was incredible. He was sensual by nature, quiet and composed, and talented as hell. I guess he'd had a lot of practice since he'd left home. The really amazing thing was when I let him top. He turned into a whole different person then - shouting and romping about, and his orgasms were joyful, like a celebration. Like for a moment, he was _free._

It didn't last of course. The junk ate him up, just like it did everyone else. He told me once that he couldn't bear what he had become and didn't remember who he used to be. That was a bad night.

So, I wasn't really surprised the night I came home and found he'd shot up a dime's worth. I thought he was already gone, but he actually opened his eyes and looked at me for a little while. He didn't say anything. Just smiled, while his heart slowed gradually to a stop.

His family didn't even acknowledge his death. He was into some of that Eastern religious stuff, like Zen and what not, so they probably considered him a heretic as well as a sodomite.

I don't know. I guess I miss him and all. He was such a good kid. Deserved better. I don't really believe all that jazz about the afterlife and stuff. But, anything's possible, so if it turns out there really is some kind of life after death—

I really hope he found a better one on the other side.

* * *

><p>Rōjūrō Ōtoribashi (Roger "Rose" Doherty)<p>

died AD 1969 San Francisco, California  
>born NE 3565 Rukongai<p> 


	2. Hiyori

**Rating:** T (Prostitution, murder, addict's rationale, bad parenting)

**Disclaimer:** Bleach is the property of Tite Kubo. I do not use its characters, settings and/or events for any profitable purpose.

* * *

><p><strong>Les Petites Morts<strong>

**II. Hiyori**

* * *

><p>I can't go on living like this.<p>

Well, that's what they told me, anyway.

They just don't understand. Nobody understands. My life is _really hard._ I have to make lots of hard decisions. My ma taught me that I have to always look out for myself, 'cause no one else will.

These people don't understand what it's like. I _need_ my stuff. I can't live without it. It's a matter of survival.

I mean, it's not like I don't feel bad about what happened to my kid. But it's not my fault. I never asked her to do anything my ma didn't make me do. Besides, the only reason I asked her is because she was young and pretty and could bring home ten times the money I could. That's just common sense economics. It's not like she said no or anything. She wanted to do it. She liked getting all dressed up and going down to the strip at night. She liked seeing the look in the eyes of them guys that paid for her time.

She was happy because I didn't put any restrictions on her. She could come and go as she pleased, long as she brought home the money. She could go with them or bring them back home, I didn't care. I would even drive her anywhere she wanted to go.

Plus, I needed my stuff. I'm sick, and she was taking care of me. That's what kids are supposed to do, they're supposed to take care of their parents when they're old and can't care for themselves anymore. She was doing her job.

It's not my fault. I'm not the one that cut her up like that. It was that guy. They told me they think he's some kinda psycho that's going around torturing and killing hookers. He looked like just another customer to me. They ought to be out trying to catch him rather than coming after me. I didn't cut her up. I didn't kill her. She was just doing her job, getting some money so she could take care of her ma.

They just don't understand. My kid is _dead. _She's gone. I'm sick, and she was all I had.

What am I going to do now?

* * *

><p>Hiyori Sarugaki (Haleigh Salgado)<p>

died AD 1989 Warren, Arkansas  
>born NE 3769 Rukongai<p> 


	3. Rukia & Hisana

**Rating:** T (disturbing imagery, angst)

**Disclaimer:** Bleach is the property of Tite Kubo. I do not use its characters, settings and/or events for any profitable purpose.

* * *

><p><strong>Les Petites Morts<strong>

**III. Rukia & Hisana  
><strong>

* * *

><p><em>Entreat me not to leave you,<em>  
><em>Or to turn back from following after you;<em>  
><em>For wherever you go, I will go;<em>  
><em>And wherever you lodge, I will lodge;<em>  
><em>Your people shall be my people,<em>  
><em>And your God, my God.<em>

_Where you die, I will die,_  
><em>And there will I be buried.<em>  
><em>The LORD do so to me, and more also,<em>  
><em>If anything but death parts you and me.<em>

Ruth 1:16–17

* * *

><p>Man, I see a lot of terrible shit in this job. When I was at the Academy, they taught us stuff like coping strategies and "empathetic detachment," and they said we'd get used to it in time. Well, I've been with the Heavy Rescue unit for almost seven years now, and "getting used to it" seems about as likely as no one ever having another accident. Maybe if people showed less propensity to being monsters, then I wouldn't spend nights alternating between bad dreams and dry heaves.<p>

There's this thing nowadays on the Internet. These websites—"shock sites" or "death sites," I guess they're called. They get hold of investigation photos from gory accidents and crime scenes and post them for the viewing public to comment on. Lovely.

A few years ago, we got a call for a vehicle extrication. Usually, EMS or an Engine unit can handle that sort of thing on their own. We only go out when the situation is exceptional, and exceptional was an understatement for this one.

A mother and her two daughters were on the Mission Valley Freeway near Grossmont. This guy running from the Highway Patrol in a stolen SUV lost control at somewhere around 110 miles per hour and rolled over onto the woman's car. When we got to the scene, the perp was long dead and gone, having been ejected into oncoming traffic and run over a few times. Lucky piece of shit.

The three females were still alive in the car, crushed against the barrier under the SUV. The teenage girl in front was crying hysterically for her baby sister, who was trapped in the infant carrier in the back, screaming at the top of her lungs. I swear, that's gotta be the worst sound in the world. Only the mother was quiet.

When we took the teenager out, she went into shock and crashed on the spot. Her legs had pretty much disintegrated, she'd lost too much blood. We couldn't get the baby in time, either. Her crying got weaker and weaker while we were still opening up the front, and then as suddenly as turning off a switch, there was this silence. I think she and the girl died at the exact same moment.

The mother was by far the hardest to extricate because of her position against the barrier, but we finally cut her free. She had fractures everywhere and a punctured lung, but we got her, and she survived. She was unconscious the whole time, probably never knew what happened. God, just imagine—you're going about your merry way, and then suddenly, out of the blue, you wake up in traction and your kids are dead.

So, last week there was a story in the paper about a CHP investigator who's been suspended. He was on the scene that day taking pictures of the baby and the girl, including close-ups of the girl's mangled lower body. I remember hearing him behind us while we were working, laughing and cracking nasty jokes. Well, he leaked the worst of the photos and they ended up on some shock site, which is bad enough. But then, somebody emailed the pictures to the mother, complete with lewd captions about the teenager's body. That's about as sociopathic as it gets.

Too much awful shit in this job. They said I'd get used to it, but I just can't. All I really see in my future is PTSD and an early retirement. I'm not gonna quit though, 'cause it's guys like me, not that cop, who _really_ influence the outcome of an incident.

And, once in a while, the story _does _have a happy ending.

* * *

><p>Rukia Kuchiki (Ruth Misaka) and Hisana Kuchiki (Naomi Misaka)<p>

died AD 1992 La Mesa, California  
>born NE 3823 Inuzuri, 78th District, South Rukongai<p> 


	4. Shūhei

**Rating:** T (war themes, religious themes)

**Disclaimer:** Bleach is the property of Tite Kubo. I do not use the characters, settings and/or events of Bleach for any profitable purpose.

* * *

><p><strong>Les Petites Morts<strong>

**IV. Shūhei**

* * *

><p><em>All souls converge upon a hopeless mote<br>tonight, as though the throngs of souls in hopeless pain rise up  
>to say they cannot care, to say they abide<br>whatever is to come._

_My air is flung with souls which will not stop_  
><em>and among them hangs a soul that has not died<em>  
><em>and refuses to come home.<em>

John Berryman, _The Dream Songs_

* * *

><p><strong>To:<strong> Muguruma Kensei taichō

**From:** Kumagai Mototsune hachiseki

**Subject:** Ground Reconnaissance Report #612840: Human World Sector 85, Location Point 1206

* * *

><p>The following events transpired during the mission conducted 14 August 3817 by twelve assigned members of the Recon Unit, under my leadership.<p>

Our investigation was of a large group of Hollows that had congregated in sector 85, just west of point 1206. Upon surveying the area, we discovered that the Hollows appeared to be following a Jibakurei at a significant distance, showing no inclination to attack it. The reason for their restraint is unknown.

The Jibakurei was that of an adolescent male Human. His neck and chest were wound around by a very long and oddly configured chain of fate, linked to his heart in the middle instead of at an end. We were unable to ascertain any points of encroachment. His appearance was very haggard, with the vacant eyes typical of a soul in great pain.

As he seemed unperturbed by our approach, we identified ourselves and attempted to interview him. He disregarded our questions, instead asking if we could show him the way to _Gehenna,_which is apparently one of the Western Territories of Jigoku. I told him that I did know the way and promised to take him there if he explained why he wanted to go. The following is the narrative we were able to piece together from his responses.

This Jibakurei had been wandering for eleven months, traveling east across the Continent from his homeland, which was at war. Several years before his death, he had been arrested for killing a militiaman. Instead of being sent to prison, he was conscripted into the partisan army, which subsequently invaded a neighboring country. It was during this time, he maintained, that he became the object of a demonic obsession. This resulted in the condition of two souls occupying one body, with neither in complete control. After participating in his first skirmish, the demon spirit began to influence him in earnest. He admitted to perpetrating many atrocities, even though he was barely fourteen Human years old at the time.

The invading army surrounded and besieged the capital city before international forces intervened and drove them back. The Jibakurei was wounded and burned during an artillery attack, and suffered alone for many days before he finally died. He told me that he was fully coherent on the night of his death, and he could hear the demon spirit laughing and mocking him, which made him very angry. He decided that he would bind the spirit and return it to Gehenna, its apparent place of origin, so that it could do no more harm in the Human world.

In the final moments before his soul departed his body, the Jibakurei claimed that he tangled the demon spirit in his chain of fate, thus preventing it from departing. To my knowledge, such an action is not within the range of Human ability, however, being bound to something inside himself rather than to an external object or place does explain why this Jibakurei was able to travel so far from his home.

I drew my Zanpakutō and performed konsō. Despite the story he had told, which suggested a life of great evil, the gates of Hell did not appear for him. He faded just like any other Plus departing for Soul Society, and the spirit that he had allegedly bound to himself was never revealed or identified. We then proceeded to dispatch the reticent Hollows that had been following him with relative ease.

In conclusion, I believe that the appearance of the group of Hollows was a simple anomaly caused by the presence of this Jibakurei. Point 1206 was successfully cleared and secured, and no further action is warranted in this case. However, the strength and tenacity of this particular soul and the possible (though unlikely) presence of an unidentified, malevolent spirit in Soul Society may be of interest to the Central 46.

Signed,  
>Kumagai Mototsune<p>

Special Reconnaissance Unit  
>Ninth Division<p>

* * *

><p>Shūhei Hisagi (Dvija Šutej)<p>

died 30 September, AD 1993, Sarajevo, Bosnia-Herzegovinia  
>born 14 August, NE 3817, Rukongai<p> 


End file.
